On any given day, I’m rewatching a comfort series about a talented writer who sometimes lacks self-awareness in her relationships with men (especially married ones). She has a signature style, lives on takeout, and is not as bad a friend as fans think she is.
If it’s fall, this series is Gilmore Girls. The rest of the year, it’s Sex and the City.
In many ways, Rory Gilmore is a mini-Carrie Bradshaw. Though the respective heroines occupy very different worlds — one a cozy Connecticut town, the other bustling, fashionable Manhattan — they share literary pursuits and a tendency for self-sabotage that lends itself to ever-present fandom discourse about how they’re the worst.
While that might be an exaggeration (you must like these people at least a little to watch them, right?), they certainly had missteps. Given how much TV Rory consumed with her mom, there’s a non-zero chance she watched Carrie navigate the messiest throes of her personal and professional life — and she seems to have taken some notes.
In honor of the return of Gilmore Girls season (aka, autumn), here are 11 times Rory was accidentally Carrie Bradshaw-coded.
The Basket Drama
When Jess and Dean fought over Rory at Bid-on-a-Basket, she wasn’t displeased to let Jess rock the boat in her current relationship. It echoes Carrie letting Mr. Big crash Aidan’s cabin and then watching the guys fight over her, leading to an all-time great Sex and the City line, “STOP IT! You’re middle-aged!”
When She Missed Lorelai’s Graduation
Though Rory could be a wonderful friend, she — like Carrie — sometimes lets her love life get in the way of other relationships. Skipping school to meet up with Jess in New York City, then missing Lorelai’s graduation, was a low point.
Accosting Dean At His Window
Carrie and Rory had a way of ambushing their exes to say, “I’m sorry.” Just as Carrie threw rocks at Aidan’s window to ask him to take her back (cue his impassioned, “You broke my heart!”), Rory climbed up a tree outside Dean’s window to apologize for how she handled her feelings for Jess in Season 3.
The Season 4 Bob
Rory cut her hair in Season 4 — a physical signifier that she was stepping into a new phase of life. Interestingly, Carrie also began her bob era in Season 4 of Sex and the City. As she put it, “Sometimes, a girl just needs a new start.”
Her A+ Apology Skills
Neither Carrie nor Rory was ever great at apologies, especially to fellow women they’ve hurt. Rory’s attempt to explain her cruel ballet review in Season 4 (“I compared you to a hippo. That’s not calling you a hippo”) is as clumsy as Carrie apologizing for her affair with Mr. Big by tracking down his wife Natasha, taking a sip of her drink, and having the nerve to say “You are?” when Natasha facetiously said she’s sorry, too.
“He’s Dean! My Dean.”
Like Carrie, Rory had a few brushes with infidelity, and her insistence that it was OK to sleep with a married Dean because they dated first definitely sounds like something Carrie might have told herself during her affair with Mr. Big.
In Omnia Paratus
Remember when Rory used a work assignment as an excuse to wear a fancy dress and mingle with an elite underground club? Yeah, Carrie would have been all over that.
When She Was Emily & Richard’s Best Man
Rory sporting a suit to Emily and Richard’s vow renewal was a bold, chic break from her usual look. You’d almost think she took a style cue from Carrie at Stanford and Anthony’s wedding in the second Sex and the City movie, where she also served as best man. But the Gilmore Girls episode aired first.
Coming To The Rescue
One of Rory’s sweeter Gilmore Girls moments was when she rushed to be by Lorelai’s side after her (first) bad breakup with Luke in Season 5. It echoes those times when Carrie was fiercely protective of her friends, from comforting Charlotte after her miscarriage to running through the snow to be with a lonely Miranda on New Year’s Eve.
Dropping Out Of Yale
They’re both skilled writers, so maybe it’s no surprise that Rory and Carrie’s words — to quote Taylor Swift — shoot to kill when they’re mad. Rory telling her mom that she simply wouldn’t understand because she didn’t go to college? Ouch! It stung like when Carrie, defending her move to Paris, accused Miranda of trying to make her stay so she’d feel better about her own life.
Saying “No” To Logan’s Proposal
Rory turning down Logan’s engagement ultimatum in the Gilmore Girls series finale was so Carrie circa Aidan.
Her Work Preparation… Or Lack Thereof
Though Rory and Carrie were both talented writers, they didn’t always put their best foot forward in the career department.
In Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life, Rory showed up to her interview at SandeeSays expecting that she’d already been given the job and then tanked when asked if she had any ideas. It’s a fumble in the same vein as Carrie being paid to teach a dating seminar and forgetting to bring actual advice besides, putting yourself out there!
When She Couldn’t Afford Underwear
Perhaps Rory’s biggest Carrie-ism came in the revival series when she lamented to Jess that she was broke: “I have no job. I have no credit. I have no underwear.”
Carrie famously had an iffy relationship with savings. (“I like my money right where I can see it: Hanging in my closet.”) You can be sure she’d give up underwear before she gave up her jaw-dropping shoe collection.
Her Wookie Fling
Rory hooking up with a cosplayer while reporting on a New York City trend piece was so delightfully Carrie-coded that you can’t help but wonder what lesson she’d derive from the experience for her column. Probably something about how we’re all wearing costumes when it comes to love.
Writing A Book
The last time viewers checked in with Rory, she was sitting down to write a book called Gilmore Girls, much like her predecessor titled her book Sex and the City. Now, neither of these women is aware of the meta fact that they live on shows with those respective titles. But still, it’s one more way Rory follows in the footsteps of her fabulous forebear.
