Dear Annie: For the past four years, my wife and I have barely spoken. We don’t share anything or do anything together anymore. The only connection I have left is driving my daughter to school.
I’ve tried everything to fix things between us, but nothing seems to work. Now divorce feels like the only option. But when I think about my daughter’s future, I feel overwhelmed and consumed by guilt. She’s 17, and I don’t want to hurt her, but I feel so lonely and depressed.
I can’t seem to figure out why I’m stuck in this situation. I know I want to leave, but something keeps stopping me. I don’t know if it’s fear, guilt or the hope that things might change. I just feel lost and unsure of what to do next.
Please help; I don’t know how much longer I can keep going like this. — Help
Dear Help: What you’re feeling is completely natural. You’re experiencing a mix of very understandable emotions, including grief for the relationship you once had and for the partnership you still long for.
The first step is to talk to your wife; let her know how you’re feeling. Marriage counseling could also be a valuable tool to help both of you better understand where the disconnection began and if you can reconnect.
Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].
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