So, so many things could have gone wrong during a live comedy roast of a notoriously volatile and competitive NFL superstar like Tom Brady that it’s almost a letdown that only one moment in particular seemed to set him off. What’s even more surprising is that it wasn’t one of the vicious barbs made about Brady personally, his ex-wife Gisele Bündchen or his family that raised his ire — it was a joke about Patriots owner Robert Kraft.
It did happen to come from the most savagely infamous roaster of the modern era, Jeff Ross, also known as the Roastmaster General for his many epic takedowns in previous roasts. But nonetheless it was rather stunning that this was the moment Brady felt crossed the line.
For those who missed it, the most viral clip of Netflix’s first of its kind special, The Greatest Roast Of All Time: Tom Brady, centered on Brady getting up from the roastee chair in the middle of Jeff Ross’ set to tell him “Don’t say that sh– again.” Ross nervously laughed it off and said “Ok, ok…” before continuing gamely with his roast.
So what was the joke that caused Brady so much offense on Kraft’s behalf? Possibly the easiest of targets from the numerous New England Patriots scandals over the years — a reference to Robert Kraft’s 2019 arrest as part of a prostitution ring in Florida in which he was captured on video paying for sex acts at a day spa.
Ross had an elaborate build up to the joke, talking about Tom Brady confidently strolling into Robert Kraft’s office after he was drafted in the sixth round, and telling the powerful businessman and New England Patriots owner, “I’m the best decision your organization has ever made…” to the applause of numerous Boston sports fans in attendance. Ross then added, “Would you like a massage?” Big audience laughs ensued, except for Brady, who shifted uncomfortably in his seat as he clearly debated whether or not to step in and say something.
When Ross’ next words after the laughter died down were “I love Robert Kraft –” Brady could take it no longer and quickly hopped up to the podium to tell Ross “Don’t say that sh– again,” which was rather awkwardly picked up by the microphones for all to hear.
Was this the best instant Brady meme since “You mad bro?”
This was instantly the best Brady sure-to-be-meme since his post-game “You mad bro?” run-in with Richard Sherman.
The question is — why? Why was a joke about his former boss the thing that got under Brady’s skin, when so many other cruel things were said about Tom Brady and his family over the course of the evening?
That’s the million dollar question yet to be answered.
Brady sat there patiently enduring vicious slams and references galore to his ex wife, Gisele Bündchen, and her new jiu-jitsu trainer beau, his past cheating scandals on the Patriots, being an absentee father, his pretty boy superficiality, his falling for a crypto investing fraud scheme, and numerous other biting jabs that might have set off even the most saintly of souls. But head scratchingly (and kind of hearteningly), it was his defense of Robert Kraft that was the one thing that made Tom Brady leave his seat in anger.
Maybe Brady sees Kraft as a grandfather figure and didn’t want the old man to get his feelings hurt. Maybe Brady assured Kraft that he wouldn’t be subject to the roasters’ material and Brady didn’t want Kraft to view him as a liar (though that didn’t seem to bother Brady during the deflategate scandal).
Whatever the reasoning, Tom Brady felt the need so strongly to defend his former boss Robert Kraft that, for a moment, he broke with roast tradition and etiquette to tell revered roaster Jeff Ross not to “say that sh– again.” It was a rather shocking blip on an otherwise freewheeling and fun night. And perhaps if Brady doesn’t want Kraft subjected to such jesting in the future, he should tell his wealthy friend to stay away from massage parlors (or at least live public roasts).
